Healing Hearts
by Nfinity
Summary: Pippin and Diamond's relationship gets off to a rocky start, as they both deal with seperate but related issues. Fluffy romance, some angsty moments.


Healing Hearts

A/N: I thought of this idea while I was reading another beautiful piece of Pippin/Diamond fanfiction, the author of which asked an interesting question: has everything been done for this beautiful relationship? Has every twist and turn been covered that could in this relationship? Probably, but I hope that I've brought a fresh perspective to a glorious relationship. Dedicated with undying friendship and love to Tiki, thanks for making me want to write something other than the 'usual'. I was tempted to make this one of the 'usual', but, for your sake, I didn't. This is kinda like my birthday present to me, innit? D Mad schnoogles and completely random squirrel appearances to everyone I admire and know (you know who you are, the list is too long), and hooray for hobbit lovin' (of all kinds ). I know the title is clichéd, sorry folks, I can't seem to come up with titles while writing a fic in one day.

There was no light in the sun now. At least, no warmth that Peregrin Took could feel. All that he felt now was the numb threat of the emptiness opening before him like a chasm, threatening to swallow him; with him standing on the brink, arms open, waiting for it to take him away into the velvety bliss of nothing. No sounds, sights, or smells could banish the depression that had settled on him, the melancholy that followed him like a ghost night and day, haunting his dreams and driving all warmth from the day. Not even Merry could bring him from this state, though Eru knew that his best friend had tried, and finally given up to enjoy life with his new bride. Estella Bolger had stolen away Merry's heart and his time, which had driven Pippin further into himself. His best friend was gone, Frodo was gone, and Pippin felt himself slipping away from everything he'd known and loved. It pressed down upon him, a great weight that suppressed all happiness and drove the warmth right from his blood. He was frightened, sometimes, by the vastness of this weight, but most times he just felt sick of carrying his burden with him.

His family didn't understand. They thought that Pippin was lonely, that he was jealous of the time Merry spent with Estella. They were partly right, though they'd missed the point by several inches. Pippin _was_ lonely, but his loneliness had started long before Estella and Merry had married. It had started at the very end of the Quest, when Frodo had sailed away forever to a place that Pippin could only dream of going. Frodo had gone, leaving his sorrow behind, along with everything he'd known and loved. Frodo had found peace and left Pippin to fend for himself in the immeasurable depths of his despair. He envied his older cousin that luxury, that Frodo could escape the demons that still plagued Pippin, the horrid nightmares and daydreams. But Pippin's parents didn't know that. They thought that it was high time he found himself a lass, and settled down. "The Thain isn't getting any younger you know," his relatives always said. "Your father wants you to be married before he passes on the Thainship to you." Pippin understood his father's wishes. But he wouldn't have been very happy with any lass for his son, Pippin's father. His son had to have the most beautiful, seductive and venomous woman Pippin had ever laid eyes on.

The first day they'd met, Pippin had felt an instant attraction to the voluptuous Diamond Took of Long Cleeve. A door opened in his heart and the darkness that hung over his head like a funeral pall lifted. But only for a moment for Diamond of Long Cleeve was proud. Though her family was poorer than most Tooks, she had been brought up with the quiet dignity that Pippin was accustomed to, along with a violent streak of pride that she was related to what her father called 'people of privilege.' She had danced and conversed with Pippin but in her arms she felt stiff, as though she was the jewel of her namesake, hard as any stone from the riverbank. That prideful streak had placed a wall of ice around Diamond's heart that Pippin didn't have the strength to break. He begged his father for any other lass, one less cold toward him. But his father, believing him only to be nervous, was adamant: Peregrin Took was going to marry Diamond of Long Cleeve. And the wedding day was fast approaching with neither of the couple speaking to each other more than was necessary.

So that's why Pippin was surprised out of his melancholy when Diamond and her father showed up on the doorstep of the Smials. Diamond looked resplendent in a homespun dress of deep lavender, accented by the deep purple lilac that was twisted in her hair. Pippin felt his breath quicken, and the darkness didn't seem so total for a moment. Then Pippin met Diamond's bright blue eyes, two pale shards of ice that mirrored her heart, and Pippin felt his heart sink into a deep well of despair, knowing that even if they got married, Diamond would never love him. Their fathers talked for a while, leaving Pippin standing uncomfortably dwelling on the inevitable, Diamond staring at him with her hard eyes. He wondered what she was thinking, with him towering over her, averting her eyes and wishing for any sign that she felt emotion. He jerked his head up when she spoke, her voice soft and timid.

"I asked Papa to bring me," she said, causing Pippin to hope what he'd never dared hope before. "I was thinking we should at least get to know each other before…" She trailed off and her cheeks flushed. She gave a soft smile, causing Pippin's heart to beat a little faster. She continued, her voice hurried and hushed, as if she wanted to get the words out before losing conviction. "I thought that since it was such a pretty day we could go for a picnic and just, you know, talk about… about anything that comes to mind I guess." Her cheeks flushed brighter as she realized that she was babbling and she looked into Pippin's eyes. Pippin, seeing something in those blue depths that gave him true hope and made him smile the first true smile he'd had in a very long time. It felt funny, like his muscles were unused to the activity they'd previously been so accustomed to. Diamond's return smile affirmed something in Pippin's heart that he'd always known.

"I think a picnic would be nice, Miss Took," Pippin said. Diamond frowned then, her mouth becoming a thin line and her eyes flashed angrily.

"Do not mock me, Peregrin Took," she spat suddenly with such venom that Pippin took an involuntary step backwards, his heart shattering in a million tiny pieces. She could never get over her pride, Pippin thought, and therefore never come to love anything but the title that came with him. Tears welled in his eyes and he hid his face behind his mane of unruly curls, willing the burning in his eyes to subside, praying she didn't notice the wet gleam in his gaze.

"I meant not to mock you Diamond," he said in a quiet sorrow-filled voice. "I would never mock you." Diamond's eyes softened and she reached up, as if to touch Pippin's arm, but she dropped it at the last second. Pippin's father called him over and any moment there had been was lost. Diamond went to pack a basket for the picnic that Pippin had moments before been looking forward to (and that he was now dreading). A few short minutes later, they set out together towards the shady woods, heaviness in Pippin's heart, with little conversation between the two.

Thought he day was bright and the sun shining on their backs was warm, Pippin felt that familiar sense of gloominess settle down in his shoulders and he turned his head away from the sun and the beautiful creature walking beside him. Diamond noticed, but said nothing until they reached a perfect clearing.

Long ago, during the early time when the Great Smials was not yet so grand, a past master of the house had found a little clearing overlooking a quaint pond, a crystalline and perfectly serene spot where cares were forgotten and even Pippin's pain was pushed aside for a while in the peace. That nameless someone had placed a bench on the bank of the pond, allowing anyone lucky enough to find this hidden treasure to sit and rest weary feet and simply enjoy the picturesque view that Nature had gifted them.

Pippin sighed in contentment as he set the basket down on the lush grass, happy for once just to have a moment of peace without the nagging pull on his heart of his depression. He smiled softly as he looked over the serene scene and he caught Diamond's soft questioning gaze. He realized that she'd never seen him truly happy before; when they'd met Merry had just gotten married and Pippin was feeling very low. Those feeling returned suddenly with a vengeance and a cloud passed over Pippin's features, causing a small frown to form on Diamond's face.

"Why are you always like this?" The question startled Pippin out of his reverie and he stared at Diamond blankly.

"Like what," he asked, a bit too gruffly. Diamond's frown deepened and Pippin inwardly cursed himself, and her, for making this so hard.

"Why is it when you smile, your face immediately becomes sad, almost forlorn." Her voice held a quiet note, matching the look on her face; she had guessed his problem.

"I… I, just…" Pippin stopped the denial forming on his lips; it would be unfair to Diamond to lie to her. "I don't know what's wrong with me," he admitted. "Every time something good happens, it seems that there's always a shadow over it that mars the occasion. I don't understand why I feel this way. I guess it started when Frodo left." He stopped. "No, it started before that. It began when we came back, the four of us. Frodo was right when he said that the shire wasn't, and never would be, the same for him. It's the same with me. Merry and Sam just fell back into their own lives, returning to everything normal and safe to them. I became so used to life on the Quest that I just couldn't adjust to anything that was once familiar to me." He seemed to be speaking more to himself now, not even realizing that Diamond was still beside him on the grass or that tears were falling from his eyes. "I don't think it'll ever be the same again." He laughed derisively. "Sometimes I wish that I could have gone with Frodo, that I had sailed away from all of my problems and simply let go of everything here to live in peace again." He fell quiet, tears coursing down his face, a lump forming in his throat. "I don't want to feel this way. It's not fair to me, to my family, to all those I love, and especially not fair to you, Diamond, that I can't be who everyone expects me to be." The sob rose in his throat and forced itself out in a choked cry. "I can't be the hobbit I should be for you, and it's unfair for you to have to marry a lad that you can't love." He averted his face from hers, not daring to think about what he'd seen in her eyes. Her tone when she spoke was serious, but there was a hint of amusement just beneath the surface.

"You silly Took," she said fondly. "What makes you think you can't be the hobbit of my dreams?" Her smile was soft and her eyes glowed sapphire in the sunlight, her dark curls a gleaming tumble as she shook her head. "Whatever ails you, we can work that out, you and I, together." She blushed. "That is, if you want to. And nobody expects you to be anyone but who you want to be. You have changed, Peregrin Took. You might not remember but I do. When I was five you tied my pigtails to a pole in the barn at Great Aunt Martheta's birthday party and left me there." She laughed at the memory. "That was the first time we met. You and that fool of a Brandybuck laughed about it for the three days we stayed here." Pippin was startled into the memory. He hadn't thought about that time in a while, all the childhood pranks the duo had pulled seemed to run together now and any one wasn't discernible in the multitude.

"I never apologized for that, but Da gave me and Merry such a whipping, it's a wonder my bottom isn't still bruised." He looked for a long time at Diamond. "You've changed a lot since then." He brushed a stray curl out of her face. "You laughed more during those three days than you have since we've been…" He trailed off and let his hand drop from her cheek. "But you got me back, remember? You stole my clothes when me and Merry went for a swim and I had to walk home wet and naked from the pond." Startled he looked around. "This pond, actually." His dry tone made Diamond laugh and Pippin cherished the sound.

"Diamond," he said in a serious tone. "Why did you agree to marry me?" Diamond stared out at the serene pond for a moment before answering, her tone slightly wistful.

"I used to think it was because, after all those years being raised like a Took, but not with the luxuries, I would finally have the life I'd dreamed of." She looked abashed and dropped her gaze to the grass between them. "But, lately, I've been more inclined to believe that I agreed to the arrangement because…" Pippin stared at her, silently urging her to continue. "Well, because of the way you looked at me at Merry's wedding, when we first danced. You made me feel like I was the only lass there and that I really mattered. I'm sorry if I seemed cold to you. I wasn't accustomed to anyone treating me like that. That night, you made me feel…beautiful." Pippin saw tears glistening in Diamond's eyes and he gently pulled her into his arms, afraid she might balk like a half-tame pony.

"Oh, but, Diamond, you _are_ beautiful. Never let anyone tell you otherwise," he said, a new life in his voice and a song in his heart. After a minute Diamond pulled back, still within the circle of Pippin's arms, to look into his face.

"Why did you agree to marry me?" she asked. Pippin thought about it for a second.

"Well, I, that is, the first time I saw you I thought you were gorgeous, and I, erm, I just wanted to, uh…" Pippin flushed, angry that he couldn't form a coherent sentence with Diamond looking at him like that. On an impulse he leaned forward quickly and kissed her gently on the mouth. Caught by surprise, Diamond opened her mouth and Pippin quickly deepened the kiss. Though it was short, it left both Tooks breathless and for a while they only stared into each other's eyes and breathed.

"Oh," Diamond said in a breathless whisper. "She pulled her arms up and threw them around Pippin's neck, bringing them closer. "Oh, Pippin, I…" As she trailed off, she tilted her head up and kissed him, an equally short and sweet kiss as the first. Pippin's smile was wide when they pulled away and he hopped up and, with a sudden burst of energy, lifted Diamond up and twirled her around through the air. When he set her down again they were both flushed from laughing and their eyes were bright. Pippin smiled at her and kneeled in front of her, telling himself that if he was going to do this, he'd do it right. Diamond stared down at him, hope shining in her eyes, the ice that Pippin had imagined around her heart melted into so many bits of slush, the wall crumbled like so many pieces of shattered glass.

"Diamond Took of Long Cleeve, will you marry me?" Diamond's sharp intake of breath said enough as Pippin reached into his waistcoat pocket and pulled out a tiny silver band, wrought of mithril (a gift from Gimli, for his future wife, as Gimli put it) with a small perfect diamond set upon it. He held the ring out to her and she took it, slipping it onto her finger and staring at it, admiring the rich beauty and delicate interweaving of mithril silver, like vines groping around the tiny gem of her namesake. She swiftly pulled Pippin up on his feet and threw her arms around him, kissing him for all that he was worth.

"Oh, Pippin, "she sighed when they broke the kiss. "It's so beautiful, I'm afraid to wear it." The question, though answered by the kiss, needed the verbal confirmation, and Diamond kissed Pippin again and buried her face in his neck for a moment. "Of course I'll marry you, Peregrin Took." Her joy overcame her and she felt that there was no need for words now, the look in Pippin's eyes matched her own and, as they kissed, they both knew the depth of the love that they felt.

Later as they walked back to the Smials, hand in hand, both with a happy grin on their faces, their relatives and loved ones noticed the change in both Tooks' demeanours and relished the change, for Pippin was happier and almost cured of his melancholy, and Diamond seemed less remote and quicker to smile and laugh. Both had found the healing they'd so desperately needed, and they'd found each other along the way.

Eglantine Took sighed as she watched the couple dance together in the waning moonlight, the only two left dancing. The band had long since departed and the only music they were dancing to was their own sweet melody. She sighed again as her husband sat down next to her and clasped her hand, watching the couple as well as they twirled and moved to their own rhythm.

"I'm so glad that he's finally happy," Eglantine said, tears in her voice. Paladin patted her hand and nodded. "And her, I've never seem those two so radiant." She sniffed and watched the couple again. "It was a beautiful ceremony, wasn't it?"

"Yes dear," the Thain said, patting his wife's hand again. Eglantine dabbed her eyes with a handkerchief and smiled through her tears.

"Just think of all the new babies that will be running around the Smials soon." She kissed him on the cheek and got up, heading to the kitchens to see how the cleaning up was getting along. Paladin sat alone for a while and sighed his own sigh as he watched his son and new daughter-in-law dance. He wasn't so sure he was as happy about new babies running around as Eglantine was…especially if they were anything like his son was at stage of his life. He got up and left the couple to their dance. The couple in turn, were oblivious to his presence, too in love to care about anyone else in the world.

FIN


End file.
